At Cemetery

When I'm among the dead
I feel sorry for the dead.
When I'm among the living
I feel sorry for myself.
I wish to understand
Or fall into believing
That life may have some sense
And I still have some faith.
I tried to figure out
In long and useless ramblings
Am I supposed to die
So calm, emotionless
Or just to feel the ground
Under my knees and find the
Way to free myself
From sin of hopelessness.

And night still seems so young
For creatures that are useless
Yet moonlight cannot guide
And help us find the ways.
We're struggling to find
Avoiding all abuses
Eternal paradise,
Adrift in time and space.
I was ill many times,
But this one may be final
So I will try to keep
My breath under control.
I walked through all these roads
But never seen the sign of
Life being something more
Than waiting for the fall.
21.09.2015